A few months ago I had the pleasure of speaking with an interesting and intelligent woman at a convention in Las Vegas who is a speaker/advocate for victims of domestic violence and survivors of child sexual abuse. Talk about hard work! I discovered that we had a shared interest in metaphysical spirituality and philosophy. I’m sure that’s why I found her fascinating!

The subject of soul contracts or pre-life blueprints (as I sometimes refer to them) came up naturally in the course of our conversation about personal relationships. She brought up the idea of ​​”karmic relationships.” I was surprised to hear her say that all forms of domestic violence and sexual abuse are the result of karmic soul contracts. She alarmed me that a woman of her influence expressed this belief to me.

I have always supported the reincarnation cycle theory. Most of us reincarnate with at least one mission in mind for each of our many incarnations. Usually there is something we seek to achieve or a lesson we wish to learn in order to redefine ourselves or refine a particular aspect of our character. I see this as a means to improve ourselves. I call this process the “pursuit of perfection.”

The idea of ​​soul contracts has been confirmed by many metaphysical authors, past life regression therapists, astral explorers, psychic researchers, and some publicly recognized practitioners. It makes sense to me that soul contracts are an essential component of pre-life designs.

To achieve our mission(s), we must enlist the help of others. It is difficult to make a significant change in our personality without involving other people. It then becomes obvious why forming contractual relationships is vital to our pre-life planning. We have all kinds of relationships in life. We maintain relationships with people, places, objects, God, and even with ourselves. All of them are fundamental to our spiritual evolution.

Our relationships, especially human ones, have a deep and lasting impression on the inner soul. In that way, our relationships greatly affect our outer personality. That’s because personal relationships involve emotions. As we know (or should know for our own good), emotions are one of the most powerful forces in the universe. emotions always make us change, for better or for worse, whether we are aware of it or not. Sometimes these changes are quite subtle, but they have a tremendous impact in creating our personal belief systems and world view.

I have a good friend who believes that a person should take full and complete responsibility for every event that occurs in their life. This is a healing philosophy that includes taking responsibility for any adverse or traumatic events we experience as adults or in childhood. In the mind of my friend, the individual creates dysfunctional relationships and situations. I guess these situations come to life through some universal principle like the Law of Attraction. This idea could possibly conflict with or complicate the karmic contract theory. By the way, my friend assures that this philosophy has made him a better person. In that sense, I don’t doubt him.

I find this idea of ​​”total responsibility” a bit extreme. I don’t think a person should take responsibility for another person’s bad behavior. I feel that we must accept our part in any relationship, but we should never blame ourselves for another person’s wrongdoing. In the case of children; they cannot take responsibility for anything an adult does to them. So that argument doesn’t make sense to me.

I can’t find anything productive that comes out of karmic soul contracts. A karmic contract, by its very nature, implies that a person voluntarily agrees to play the role of victim as “part of the deal.” According to the karmic relationship theory, the victim agrees to domestic or sexual abuse, by contract, before entering into a personal relationship. This type of attitude creates in us all kinds of negative feelings that can lead to low self-esteem and lack of self-confidence.

By accepting the karmic soul contract theory, we are inviting physical, mental, and emotional illness into our lives. This mindset can lead to severe depression and an assured future of failed relationships. Is this what we want for ourselves? It also gives the abuser a justification for his bad behavior. That way, you can give the person a sense of power. This does not lead to anything good, as the abuser learns very little, if anything, from the harrowing experience. In fact, if we validate the abuser in his role, it only encourages the person to continue this hurtful behavior in future incarnations. I’ve always said that a little short-term guilt is healthy.

I believe that if two people entered into a soul contract with the intent to create a “karmic relationship”, it is automatically telling one of the parties that he or she agrees to be subject to potential abuse by the other person. Why would someone enter into a contract with the possibility of being abused? That is not logical. If this were the case, people would be forced to enter life with pre-existing animosity towards the soon-to-be abuser. One person might say, “Well, we can both learn something from the experience.” Do we want to learn to hate the other person? I certainly wouldn’t want to learn to hate anyone, or have someone hate me. Hate is a terribly strong word for a person to express. Hate is an all-consuming emotion, and it is completely destructive. I cannot see that a soul contract of this nature would ever be created if the result would lead to hatred from the other person involved in the relationship. Such a result is not beneficial to anyone.

Let me just say that it is virtually impossible for either party to a soul contract to predict how a particular “play” or “drama” will play out. A person’s life can go in any direction. Why would someone want to enter into a contract with a person who abused them in a previous life? If this relationship turns out to be as bad as the last one, did we learn anything from the experience? Will we continue this relationship in future lives? If so, how long does this relationship continue before we learn the last lesson? Such behavior is a clear indication of insanity. We want to avoid instilling that kind of thinking in ourselves. It is not healthy for us to indulge in such sadistic fantasies. I encourage comments and discussion on this topic.