Most of us are well aware of some of our weaknesses. Things like low self-esteem, worry, or being judgmental. We realize that we are not living up to what we consider our ideal selves and that this requires some self-improvement.

However, what each of us understands by self-improvement is probably different. What kind of person would each of us like to be? What features matter? Are there excellent characteristics that we admire in others and would like more in ourselves?

Some of us need more creative or open-minded thinking. Alternatively, we may like more emotional intelligence or other character strengths critical to living life effectively.

The ideal might be something that involves what has traditionally been called moral virtue. A difficulty in defining the quality that exemplifies higher principles of life. Because of this, it is not easy to draw the line between character strengths and moral virtues. On which side do personal qualities such as courage, discretion, cleanliness, commitment, empathy, seriousness, self-discipline, forgiveness, etc. fall? Are these strengths or virtues? And does it matter?

Self-improvement in social functioning

When we mix well with people, they tend to accept us socially. This will increase our confidence and self-esteem and decrease stress. An ideal is to be as attractive as possible. Take advantage of good looks, maintain a proportionate body, exercise natural wit and charm; all this results in popularity. Having a better sensibility towards hairstyle, clothing, home furnishings, music and the arts could all enhance one’s social appeal to those with similar tastes.

Social acceptability is a virtue when needed to deal with difficult people. Examples include trying to accomplish useful things like bringing people together, making friends with shy people, and offering constructive criticism.

Dishonesty is obviously socially unacceptable. However, a genuinely honest person cannot simply be identified as one who, for example, practices honest dealings and does not cheat. Such actions could be taken simply because the individual thinks honesty is the best policy, or because he fears discovery.

Behaving decently and honoring debts are not virtues if done only for the sake of one’s social position. But perhaps they become a virtue if they express one’s deepest values ​​about being considerate of others.

self improvement at work

Just as we need to exercise regularly to improve fitness and strength, we can enhance character strengths at work to improve customer relationships and bring out the best in subordinates. If so, we could better learn how to be more decisive, better manage time, or develop sales, negotiation, collaboration, or organizational skills.

Success in business or in one’s profession can often bring influence and control over other people. This could be the case within a large company or a public bureaucracy. However, how progress is achieved has a moral dimension. Sincerity and integrity are in keeping with telling the truth. We must acknowledge other people’s ideas and not misappropriate their property. This is in line with the principle of respecting other people.

Power can provide the means to make changes that others may not like. The exercise of power can apparently do wonders for the ego. But this is only an illusion. Dictator Adolf Hitler used the character strengths of perseverance, leadership, and charisma. He sought political power for the sake of his chance to conquer the world and impose his vision on the German people no matter the cost. Instead, a virtuous person would have been doing the right thing in the service of the common good rather than self-interest.

Self-improvement within the family.

You cannot hide when you live closely with others on a daily basis. Family life tests our tolerance for the behavior of others. It reveals our character.

As family members develop, they change. A strength of character is being open to the new experience of changes in the partner’s roles and interests and the positive and negative emotions that come with this adjustment.

One strength as a parent is sharing activities with children in a way that involves being prepared to step out of our comfort zone and be creative. Another strength is living mindfully in the present moment without looking to the past with guilt or to the future with worry. Likewise, the self-control trait harmonizes with the moral principle of moderation and is therefore often viewed as a virtue.

A moral idea is that the family bond should be nourished by loyalty to the couple and we should not adopt a seductive attitude towards others. Consequently, purity of thought and respect for sexual fidelity rather than sexual license has been a virtue.

“Virtue has its own reward, but not box office sales.(Movie star Mae West)

“In Hollywood, a girl’s virtue is much less important than her hairstyle. (Movie star Marilyn Monroe)

Aspects of moral virtue

For the spiritual philosopher Emanuel Swedenborg, there are three aspects of virtue.

• Thinking that moral principles are correct.

• Feel that these principles are good.

• Do things according to these principles.

My conclusions on self-improvement.

Many cultures, if not all, have some sense of moral judgment and a principled distinction between “right and wrong.” Some examples are justice, sexual fidelity, altruism. Such ideas inform us about what is virtuous.

Any force of character is virtuous if it is motivated by what is considered a moral principle. To illustrate: developing effort and courage in the political campaign is a virtue if you truly support the ethic of environmentalism, sexual equality, or social justice. But not if it’s done for selfish ends like fame and power.

So the same human traits can be a strength of character or a moral virtue. It depends on the moral principles, if any, behind your actions. Without a desire for what is right and good, strength of character has no virtue, whether it is courage, generosity, gratitude, or self-control.

When we know what to improve within ourselves then this helps with the age old question ‘How should I live then?’