What is codependency?

I have known numerous men who have been in relationships with clingy, needy, overly emotional, jealous, and controlling women. These men are frustrated with what they perceive as their girlfriend’s flaws. They often don’t realize that their own behavior is contributing to the unhealthy relationship and allowing it to persist.

These men are often stuck in codependent relationships. The term “codependent” is commonly used to refer to people who are overly dependent on their partners, use them as crutches, and don’t want to leave their side. However, it can be applied to any unhealthy emotional dependency. When a man stays in a relationship with a clingy, jealous and critical partner, Hears He feels dependent on your approval.

Any man with a high level of self-esteem and a healthy attitude towards relationships would not tolerate such a relationship. He would take steps to stop the pattern or just walk away. Men who get stuck in a codependent relationship, on the other hand, end up following an endless pattern of trying to please their partner and become frustrated when their desire for freedom conflicts with their partner’s need to rigidly conform to their patterns. of behavior needed.

All relationships should have a lot of mutual acceptance, space to be alone, time with friends (of both genders), and respect. Codependent relationships often lack these things.

There are two dynamics in such relationships:

1) Her problems (often related to low self-esteem) lead her to be controlling, jealous, and overly sensitive.

2) His problems (often related to shame and wanting to please) drive him to stay in an unhealthy relationship, despite stress and dissatisfaction, for fear of disappointing her.

Are you in a codependent relationship?

If you’re in a codependent relationship with a needy or controlling woman, the relationship may be especially restrictive. Some common features of these relationships include:

• You have to always let him know where you are.
• When you are away, you have to talk on the phone several times a day.
• You are discouraged from keeping friends
• She actively dislikes some of your friends and/or family, and is offended that you have them as a part of your life.
• She tries to control his use of the Internet or monitors his email and other online communications (Facebook, etc.)
• She shows excessive jealousy
• He has a hard time letting go of minor issues and instead insists that the two of them talk about them at length.
• He mistrusts you and looks at you suspiciously, even if you haven’t done anything wrong.
• He often criticizes your behavior.
• You often find yourself “walking on eggshells” around him.
• Your friends tell you that you shouldn’t put up with her, but you feel the need to stay.
• You can’t say what you think because you are too afraid of how he will react.
• You’ve been thinking about breaking up for a long time, but you don’t want to break her heart.
• You feel like she may not be able to live without you, or you tried to break up and she threatened to take drastic action (quit her job, hurt herself, etc.)

These are just a few possible indicators of a codependent relationship, and this is by no means an exhaustive list.

What’s wrong with codependent relationships?

Relationships should be places of comfort and acceptance, and should be avenues for in expansion your horizons, without restricting them. Relationships should add joy to one’s life, and although they often go through difficult times, a relationship should not be a constant burden. Codependent relationships can be so stressful and restrictive that the men involved often reach a boiling point and explode with their partner. It’s like a release valve, and after the pressure dissipates a bit, they fall back into the pattern.

It’s up to these men to determine if they want to stay in that relationship or find their way to freedom. If you see yourself described in this article, have hope: many men are trapped in similar situations and there is a way out. I’ve written e-books especially for guys like you – it’s affordable for All the menYou want to get out of unhealthy relationships. If you feel like you need to leave your relationship but fear the consequences of doing so, my ebook on ending unhealthy relationships will guide you to do so as quickly and compassionately as possible.